Tuesday 7th June

Spent the afternoon lying in a forest glade in Wanstead Park. Jennifer sat up, looked charming and played with the grass. Invisible birds chirped in the background as I fed Jennifer and ate my picnic. Passing people smiled fondly at us. You would never have thought I contemplated suicide at 3am in total despair as to lack of sleep. But I expected to be there with a crowd of Mummy friends, and never found them. Just heard they were at someone's house instead, how did I miss that? I'm functioning at half mast. Haven't started packing for Paris yet. Leaving on Thursday morning, and the strategic implicatioons of travelling plus baby and pram on the coach are quite big!

There was a pair of policemen on patrol in the park. What a wealthy society, to be able to afford such a sensible, unobtrusive, reassuring measure. To think of it, to action it. If you look at it cold bloodedly, after decades of colonial looting left this country much wealthier than mine, wasnt it clever of me to follow the wealth? Now, how can I move back and entice it to follow me? Sitting in the Nairobi Arboretum is just as blissful, much less isolated, and not as safe.